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This is a topic from the Penguin Board Games forum on inthe00s.
Subject: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 03/30/03 at 05:09 p.m.
She never sleeps
The Mystic came home to her crystal caverns one night after a long day of prophesying at the bank. She went straight to the television but ALAS, it only made her day worse. Much MUCH worse. She hated to watch it, yet her curiosity kept her eyes and ears focused on the program.
Bedtime. She tried to sleep, but she kept tossing and turning as the words kept running through her head:
"It was a beautiful flower from Sasha Cohen you know.....a beautiful flower from Sasha Cohen....it was so sweet from all the skaters....a beautiful flower from Sasha Cohen....a beautiful flower from Sasha Cohen..."
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 03/30/03 at 10:19 p.m.
Waste perfectly good prose at the end of a locked thread? I think not.... :(
And lastly did the Indyman quoteth:
But Pippin was still at the Blazers game because they went into overtime with the Lakers. Even though he was washed-up and on the bench, he still thought he could be a part of a NBA championship run.
And Meriadoc did answereth:
And so Indy doth blithereth, blissfully unaware that Peregrine hath made a point of never watching Basketball, Football, Baseball etc. etc. as part of a one-man hobbit conspiracy to driveth Speedo Boy hopelessly insane, and also, therefore, Indy having the untrammled audacity (not to mention tenacity, duplicity and viscosity) to ejecteth sport into the Queen's beloved thread, is soon to findeth that he will be hopelessly and helplessly morphethed into a giant clam, and not a talking one either.... :o
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: wombert on 03/31/03 at 02:05 p.m.
And Chewbacca did interject, "ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!" in his native Wookiee tongue, which being interpreted is:
"Looks like Sgt. Akbar will never become Admiral!"
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 03/31/03 at 02:41 p.m.
MEANWHILE, the Queen waiteth for the Mystic to respond to the opening dialogue of this thread, for what a very clever opening it was! One which only those of the Sisterhood would understand the humor of.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Indy Gent on 03/31/03 at 05:16 p.m.
Which is unfortunately not a strong suit for our ADD guest Meriadoc, who is then banished into the world of games by the Mystic and the Queen, who then orders the sports hating ham's head taken off. ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: CrazyRacoonGurl124 on 03/31/03 at 06:46 p.m.
Meanwhile, The Raccoon was somewhere far, far away. She was just thinking (don't try this at home, kids) when who should come along but...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: MystiCofSingcratia on 03/31/03 at 09:15 p.m.
...
Saddaam Hussein.
Yes, that is right; in his utter confusion, the cowardly thug of a dictator hath lost himself in the Amnesia, seeking to escape his impending doom. Ultimately, and inevitably, he happeneth upon the glorious dwelling of the celebrated Mystic, who one may well know by now, can hardly turn a cold shoulder to any desperate visitor, no matter how pathetic; against better judgement, she inviteth him in to a pleasant dinner, and rest, and in his naivite, he accepteth. He is treateth to a sumptuous feast, and afterward, as is her custom, the euphonious Mystic engageth in song, lulling the Iraqui president into deep slumber from which nothing could wake him. The coniving Mystic then immediately tip-toeth into her kitchen, and rummageth in her hardware drawer, through a large assortment of nails, and, anyone who hath ever attended Sunday School under the teaching of the "Mother" of all SS teachers, knoweth how this development will end...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: the headless hobbit on 04/01/03 at 06:14 a.m.
The ghost of Meriadoc watched as JaeLofSyncratia scrabbled through her hardware drawer, wondering why she had forgotten to pick up more tent pegs the last time she was at the store.
And Merry wondered also when Peregrine would avenge him....
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/01/03 at 03:50 p.m.
But then the Buzzer rang, and it was time for the Mystic to go forth and teach yet another Sunday School lesson. But this one was for the class of teenagers. She told the tale of Potiphar's wife, how she greatly wanted that hottie named Joe. To demonstrate she sang the Missy Elliott song....
Needless to say, the Queen is now no longer the only one of her family who has been kicked out of Sunday School...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: CrazyRacoonGurl124 on 04/01/03 at 06:29 p.m.
It seemed that the Raccoon was the only good sister. :P
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/02/03 at 03:02 p.m.
Until she met Mary Jane...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: CrazyRacoonGurl124 on 04/03/03 at 01:45 p.m.
Hey, what are you tryin to say?? :P
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/03/03 at 06:27 p.m.
But it was too late for Mary Jane. Before she had time to possess the Raccon Gurl, the robotic Richard Simmons came to take her away.
"Whew!" said the Raccoon Gurl. "How can I ever thank you?"
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/04/03 at 01:50 p.m.
"Well," said he, "you could START by bringing me Princess's Torso Men. Oh sure...they look buff.....IN PHOTOGRAPHS!!! But in reality...they're FAT!!! THEY'RE FAT!!!!!!!!!!"
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 01:51 p.m.
Don't you know you can flex fat?
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 04/04/03 at 01:53 p.m.
After yet another sleepless night, the Queen realized she would never cease to be haunted by the headless hobbit and that she had no choice but to do a singing spell and bring him back to life... ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 01:55 p.m.
And so they sang and danced in a ritual of darkness, with a little help from the Ents...Hoom!
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 04/04/03 at 01:58 p.m.
"That is so much better!" exclaimed Merry with relief, "I do so hate feeling lightheaded.... Now to locate Pippin and find some devious way to get even with the sportmonger..." :o
"But first! I must pay my cable bill!"
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 01:59 p.m.
There are no bills in Mordor! cried the foul demon king Sauron.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 04/04/03 at 02:04 p.m.
"Oh Sugar!" said Merry. "Couldn't you have told me that before I did that automatic telephone check for $96?"
Mordor? Mordor? Hey! Wait a minute....
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 02:06 p.m.
You'd better get out the Capital One card before the Uruk-Hai overrun the place! :o
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 04/04/03 at 02:10 p.m.
But alas! All of Merry's Capital One cards had been maxed for long distance phone calls to Peregrin in Gondor...
Now what could be done?
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 02:11 p.m.
You could switch to T-Mobile! Look, there's Catherine Zeta-Jones now! :D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 04/04/03 at 02:15 p.m.
But Merry already had T-Mobile. Unfortunately, altho' they had free calling throughout much of Middle Earth, that privelege did not extend to the land-down-Gondor... :'(
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 02:16 p.m.
My friend Alf suggests 10-10-220...Emmitt Smith, Mike Piazza and Terry Bradshaw concur. Mr. T wants you to use 1-800-COLLECT though, for reasons I can't divulge, but he is rather convincing, no?
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 04/04/03 at 02:19 p.m.
Methinks Mr. Cube watcheth too much television...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Carrot Top on 04/04/03 at 02:19 p.m.
Dial right down the center Meriadoc!
C.A.L.L.A.T.T.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 02:21 p.m.
Mr. T sees Carrot Top and goes into Rocky III mode...his prediction? Pain...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Carrot Top on 04/04/03 at 02:23 p.m.
Quoting:
Mr. T sees Carrot Top and goes into Rocky III mode...his prediction? Pain...
End Quote
Oh no! Where did I leave my pants?
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 02:25 p.m.
To which Doc Brown replies, "Pants? Where you're going you don't need pants..."
Mr. T chuckled in Mr. THX surround sound...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: CopyCube on 04/04/03 at 02:25 p.m.
Uh Oh! We seem to have reproduced a thread! Who hit that thaliaprodactor button? :o
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Dark Force on 04/04/03 at 02:31 p.m.
It is I, Dark Force who will squash the Carrot boy to death. It is then, that I will drink him out of my beer stein and belch.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 02:33 p.m.
The Dark Force will be most handy in Mr. T's everlasting fight against the evil powers of Carrot Top...whom he pities, the poor fool...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Carnie Freak on 04/04/03 at 02:36 p.m.
Please, please help that poor, poor Carrot head. Why he's our red-headed step child.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 03:38 p.m.
Adapted for Carrot Top:
Kill the Top! Slit his throat! Drink his blood!
And then open his head so stuff will come out and turn red :P
Ah, Lord of the Flies...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/04/03 at 06:16 p.m.
But then Carrot Top's MAMA, who was once Lil Orphan Annie, came to his rescue.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 06:19 p.m.
And then came Raggedy Ann and Andy, who looked like they needed a shower and a perm...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/04/03 at 06:26 p.m.
But before they could rinse, Martha Stewart came and turned them into light-switch covers.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 06:28 p.m.
So Batman had to swoop in, defeat Martha Stewart, give the Raggedys the antidote, and take evil Martha to Arkham Asylum.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/04/03 at 06:29 p.m.
...where they were greeted by Jon Arbuckle
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 06:32 p.m.
who was trying to keep Garfield from clawing out the padded walls...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: princessofpop on 04/04/03 at 06:46 p.m.
As the Queen patiently awaits the Princess' next headless torso, she starts to wonder...what is it exactly that is luring her to these sculpted masses of flesh? Is it the saltyness of their sweaty skin? Or is it simply the freakish curiosity of what it's like to be with a faceless creature?
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 06:48 p.m.
Or perhaps she has been seduced by the cuisine of Hannibal Lecter...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/04/03 at 06:58 p.m.
OR she likes to imagine the face of her beloved "Bluto" atop the torso... :D "Ahh, yummy!" says she.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Emergency_Cube on 04/04/03 at 09:14 p.m.
Except, for whatever reason, Bluto liked anorexic women that he could tie into knots... ::)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/05/03 at 08:37 a.m.
The Queen was filled with much sorrow. "Well," she said to herself, "I guess I'll have to get the Mystic to make me stop eating." But the Queen couldn't find the Mystic anywhere. In fact, she couldn't find Wombert or the RaccoonGurl either.
So she had to sing herself to stop eating:
Where have all my sisters gone?
LONG TIME PASSING
Where have all my sisters gone?
Long time ago...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: princessofpop on 04/05/03 at 08:50 a.m.
testing 123
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/05/03 at 09:12 a.m.
Now the Queen was filled with much fear that her thread may randomly disappear.
She changed her song to:
Where have all the moderators gone...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: princessofpop on 04/05/03 at 09:15 a.m.
I bet the "Dark Force" has cast an EVIL spell on this thread. >:( He who messes with the Queen must be hanged!
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/05/03 at 05:16 p.m.
But the Queen had mercy (HA!) on this Dark Force and instead trasformed him into Paddington and sat alongside Junior Asparagus and Boris the Bear.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: CrazyRacoonGurl124 on 04/07/03 at 08:10 p.m.
Boris snickered. "Welcome to my treeeeeeeeee!"
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Zella on 04/07/03 at 11:32 p.m.
Is it my imagination, or has this thread gotten a tad dull since it has become hobbitless? ???
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Dude on 04/08/03 at 03:12 a.m.
Gotten a tad dull? ::)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/08/03 at 09:50 a.m.
The Queen ignored these 2, since they rarely participated in the story anyway.
She cried out, "Princess? Princess? Wherefore art thou, O Princess of Pop? I have seen the very same torso for 2 days in a row"
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: princessofpop on 04/08/03 at 09:57 a.m.
Why I am right here your majesty! Yes, it is true, my torso slave has stayed waaaay past his welcome. Although, I seem to be having some trouble finding another torso to hold captive that isn't fully nude. ;)
Therefore, I shall find a new slave tomorrow, only this time he won't be headless! :o
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/09/03 at 04:41 p.m.
The Queen knew that the Princess would chose wisely, so she planned to arrange an engagement to this new *slave* (Queen's can do that, ya know)
But what will become of her present suitor, Kirk?
AmenRa went to the Mystic to use her MCP-Ms. Cleo Powers. They held a seyance. The Mystic became possessed with the spirit of a small child and thus sang this song:
Sittin' on my fencepost, chewin' my bubblegum, playin with my yo-yo *doo-wop* *doo-wop*
Along came Kirky the Turkey, and he was THIS BIG I said "Kirky, what happened?" he said "I just saw the Queen..."
"Oh dear," said AmenRa. "He shall be greatly upset. Whatever shall I do?"
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: CrazyRacoonGurl124 on 04/10/03 at 01:39 p.m.
"Well," said Kirky, "if you're not doing anything later..." ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice Cube on 04/10/03 at 06:17 p.m.
"...Let's go to Stanley Spadowski's Playhouse! Who wants to drink from the fire hose?"
:D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/11/03 at 10:35 a.m.
The Queen certainly did, but first she had to take care of a problem the Mystic was having. She was threatening to rid the board of her presence, seeing as some were complaining about her.
"I won't stay and be a burden to anyone," she said to AmenRa.
"NOBODY calls you that, sissy," the Queen replied.
"MMM? THEY do!" the Mystic shouted, pointing to various members of the board. "They say I SLEEP all day!"
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: CrazyRacoonGurl124 on 04/14/03 at 01:29 p.m.
"Oh, Mystic, that's ridiculous," Queen AmenRa replied. "Everyone knows you never sleep..."
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/14/03 at 03:50 p.m.
"That's right," the Racoon Gurl chimed in. "Because the world is spinning. When it stops, it's just beginning..."
However, her rambling was halted when suddenly...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/14/03 at 04:01 p.m.
...the Queen's post became invisible.
As if THAT weren't bad enough...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice Cube on 04/14/03 at 04:09 p.m.
...it appeared poor Rice Cube had fallen victim to the dreaded "straw man fallacy," whereafter he was soundly berated by the many guises of the Tarzan Boy. But Rice Cube shrugged it off and chuckled with mild embarrassment, for Rice Cube has been known to make these mistakes ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/15/03 at 03:03 p.m.
So he just walked along, but then he was tripped, and he fell into a Puddle of Mudd. He then heard a voice saying, "Aww... did I do that? OOPSY!!!" Rice began to cry, for he knew that this was the voice of...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice Cube on 04/15/03 at 03:26 p.m.
...Billy Barty, aka Noodles McIntosh! :o Or at least his reincarnated spirit...you see, Noodles had died tragically several years ago...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/15/03 at 03:43 p.m.
However, everyone thought he was a lizard
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 05/08/03 at 00:09 a.m.
Months past, and Meriadoc was becoming very bored in the guise of a headless wandering ghost of a hobbit. Finally, tiring of this existence, he went to visit the famous Dr. Naikrovek who hooked him up to his life machine, and voila! Merry was once again fully incarnate to the delight of his beloved Peregrin and disgust of the good Queen. To celebrate, the hobbits decided to hold a flatworm festival...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Homer Simpson on 05/08/03 at 12:10 a.m.
MMMmmmm....flatworms. ;D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 05/13/03 at 07:33 p.m.
Meriadoc at last becomes really and truly corporeal... :D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Indy Gent on 06/03/03 at 05:39 p.m.
And Peregrin married Malcolm Higgins and lived Dysfunctionally Happy Ever After. ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/03/03 at 06:19 p.m.
Ahhhhh...... IndyGent knew that Meriadoc needed a smile today.... :)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Indy Gent on 06/04/03 at 00:26 a.m.
Indy Gent also knew that the story thread needed to get rolling again. Now that Meriadoc was smiling again, his work was done, but the story is still continuing.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/05/03 at 08:33 a.m.
Now, when we last left our furry footed friends, they were...
Where were they? Indy, help! :o
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: karen (Guest) on 06/05/03 at 09:25 a.m.
I think the Queen took them with her when she went away
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/06/03 at 01:04 a.m.
But they both escaped! And lo and behold, to Merry's delight, he found that the little bottle of elexir that he had nicked from the Queen's pantry contained a magic restorant, as powerful as a thousand hugs, guaranteed to cure tiredness due to barking-dog induced sleepless nights, sprained wrists, and stress-filled work days.... And an even bigger plus - it tasted just like Coke! So he poured a generous cupful for Peregrin.... :)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: karen (Guest) on 06/06/03 at 04:37 a.m.
Quoting:
So he poured a generous cupful for Peregrin.... :)
End Quote
he?
who instantly leapt up and started to dance about shouting about the vision they had whilst in the deep deep sleep.
"It was marvellous. I understand all about...."
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/06/03 at 03:18 p.m.
....but Pippin's words were cut off abruptly as the marvelousness of the revelation overwhelmed him. "That's much better! exclaimed Merry. "I do much prefer the strong, silent (and compliant) types...." ;)
Meriadoc contemplated the events of the past few months, while he had wandered lonely as a cloud ghost. The tragic crash of the Anteater and the loss of all those tribbles overwhelmed him with sadness, but he was relieved to think that never again would he have to taste a single banana. The Queen, upon her departure, had willed her magnificent wonderbra made from two baby alligators to Pippin, which had partially comforted him for his loss at never witnessing her second coming.
Somewhere on the loose however, was a collector from the Intergalactic Bank, looking for the cubelet heirs so as to extract the sum of $2,750.000.099 I.G.s drawn on the bank and not honored. "I hope'" murmered Merry, "that they don't send the paraflugiaglax....."
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Peregrin on 06/07/03 at 01:34 a.m.
Pippin celebrated his return to the story by wrapping the alligator bra round Pippin's head, and inviting Merry to a 'private dance' to celebrate their reunification .... ;D :o
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/07/03 at 07:44 p.m.
Like the Germanys? ;D
Hmmmm..... if Indy doesn't get back in here and provide some new background this could devolve into a debautch.... :P ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Indy Gent on 06/07/03 at 09:22 p.m.
Indy Gent stopped by just in time to break up the Merry-Pippin tryst. Then the two of them went out looking for Malcolm, who was too busy having sex with Royce. "I hope he's into a four-way", replied Merry.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/07/03 at 09:25 p.m.
"Methinks Malky would do it with anything that couldn't run faster than him, and in any quantity" quipped Merry. "Doth IndyGent thinketh that Malcolm should be enlightened?"
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Indy Gent on 06/07/03 at 09:29 p.m.
Indy said, "I don't care if Malky likes it or not. If he doesn't sign in to the story thread, he is up Sh!te Crick without a proverbial paddle." Merry and Pippin, overjoyed by this statement, went over to Malcolm's house and placed a padded bra over his eyes.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/07/03 at 09:32 p.m.
"But where oh where are the oreos?" inquired Merry? "Quick - someone go find Billy....." :P
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Indy Gent on 06/07/03 at 09:39 p.m.
So Pippin went in search of Billy dressed as a man of course. As soon as she knocked on his door, Billy answered and fainted. "Now I'll never know", gasped Billy, as he recognized Pippin's eyes. "Don't sweat it buddy", Pip answered. "I just came by to borrow your cookies." Then Billy fainted again. 'Men!", Pippin thought.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/07/03 at 10:49 p.m.
And as the trio burned a Plume under his nose, in an attempt to revive him, they all broke out into a rollicking chorus of "Billy Please Be Our Toy Boy"....
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/07/03 at 10:59 p.m.
they tried to revive Billy many times, but they just couldnt do it....it wasnt until Merry said he/she would reveal his.her true gender that Billy did awake.....
(got you here ;) )
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Peregrin on 06/07/03 at 11:10 p.m.
Lamentably for Billy F, Merry sent Peregrin to revive him, which Pippin did with illacrity (whatever that is) - everyone was happy - all that is, except, perhaps, Billy :P :P :P
No, got YOU Billy ;D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/07/03 at 11:15 p.m.
Then entered Michael, who said nothing and just followed everyone around and did nothing. But deep inside, he wanted to know the real identity of Merr-Pippen, and who stole his cookies...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/07/03 at 11:19 p.m.
And Merry then realized he must curb his behavior and so politely offered young Mikey some camomille tea....
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Peregrin on 06/07/03 at 11:23 p.m.
Mike! Don't use the term "Deep Inside" :o
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/07/03 at 11:23 p.m.
young Mikey then made a counter offer to see the answer, but Merry declined, Pippen did also...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/07/03 at 11:25 p.m.
And Merry said to Pippin "Ixnay on the aughtynay, eway avehay a inormay erehay!" :P
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/07/03 at 11:26 p.m.
Billy was getting very fstrated with the fact that he didnt know what gender Merry and Pippin were..so he decided that he was gonna call up Malcolm and set up a plan to find out once and for all what their genders are
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/07/03 at 11:28 p.m.
But first, you must promise to cover Mikey's eyes... :o
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/07/03 at 11:29 p.m.
Billy then said "ichaelMay nowskay igpay atinlay"
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/07/03 at 11:31 p.m.
Michael then answered, "I am nlyoay a inormay by ayday, by ightnay I am UNION JACK!" He then broke out his costume, and flew into the sunlight. He then returned and commented how night fall wasnt until a few hours later. He then proceded to remove his costume and drink some tea.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/07/03 at 11:31 p.m.
"Well," replieth Meriadoc, "we could spell everything out and take away his spell checker!" ;) (We still love ya, Michael :) )
(Modified to spell my own name right.. ::) )
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Peregrin on 06/07/03 at 11:36 p.m.
Pippin recommendeth F7 in all micrsoft products - however stops short of recommendething all micrsoft products themselves ;D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/07/03 at 11:37 p.m.
Quoting:
"Well," replieth Meriadoc, "we could spell everything out and take away his spell checker!" ;) (We still love ya, Michael :) )
(Modified to spell my own name right.. ::) )
End Quote
lol
Michael then said that that would work...he lowered his head and started drawing pictures of the clock out of bordness simply because he felt left out...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/07/03 at 11:41 p.m.
now back to Billy's plan.....Billy invited Malcolm and Royce over to join him Merry, Pippin, Indygent and Michael so that the true identity of the hobbits would be discovered........but first, on the reconmendation of Merry, Billy told Michael that his stolen cookies were in the closet, and when he walked in therre, Billy Locked him in
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/07/03 at 11:41 p.m.
Suddenly all the friends heard a sharp rapping on the door. Merry peered out the window and was horrified to see that it was the paraflugiaglax holding the bad check that the late Rice had drawn on the Interglactic Bank.... "uh oh! Trouble..."
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Peregrin on 06/07/03 at 11:43 p.m.
Pippin enquires if there will be dressup games at this Florio party :D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/07/03 at 11:43 p.m.
This looks like a job for UNION JACK, but hes locked in the closet...so everyone but Mikey is screwed!
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/07/03 at 11:44 p.m.
Isn't anyone concerned that there is a very angry paraflugiaglax outside the door? :o
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/07/03 at 11:47 p.m.
then the ghost of Rice cube appeared...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/07/03 at 11:57 p.m.
And was carted off screaming and yelling by the paraflugiaglaxic agent of the Interglactic Bank...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/07/03 at 11:58 p.m.
Billy told Pippin, that yes, there will be dress up games, but before that, everyone will have to get undressed.....Billy and Malcolms plans start to unfold...hahahahahaha
Also the ghost of Rice Cube can join in..and that monster thingy if he wants
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/08/03 at 00:00 a.m.
Night fell...
Union Jack survived in teh closet on his cookies, and then busted through the door just in time to see everyone naked...he once again felt left out, and drew pictures of the clock...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Peregrin on 06/08/03 at 00:01 a.m.
With disdain, Pippin noted that the paraflugiaglaxic agent of the Interglactic Bank, was in fact a gaint anteater
Ewwwww :-/ ;D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/08/03 at 00:04 a.m.
It morphed then - when last spotted it had lots of arms and eyes....
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/08/03 at 00:10 a.m.
Quoting:
It morphed then - when last spotted it had lots of arms and eyes....
End Quote
just like Pat Sajack..... ;D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/08/03 at 00:11 a.m.
upon seeing Malcolm, it ramed into him as hard as possible, "we gotta get out of this place," Indy said, and they all started out, but then Indy was ramed by the creture. This was a job for Union Jack. Union ran into the beast, and it collapsed. Everyone ran through the door, Billy stood in the door way waiting for MAlcolm, Indy, and Union who were still inside, "come! Before its too late!" He yelled. Malcolm got up and started towards teh door, but the creture threw him through the window. Indy then nailed the creture in the back of the head. Indy was then thrown into Billy and the both fell through the door. "Union!" Billy yelled. the creature approached Union. "LEave me!" Union yelled. Billy knodded solumnly and started away.
Union was thrown into the kitchen, and he grabbed the gas pipe and took out a lighter. "Here we go," he said, then he paused.
"Wheres Union?" Merry asked, "hes still inside," Billy answered. Then, out of nowhere, Union came flying. The house then exploded. The group then went out for sodas.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/08/03 at 00:12 a.m.
You know, somebody needs to email this link to Malcolm - it is too bad he is missing out... ::)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Peregrin on 06/08/03 at 00:14 a.m.
Mighty crap ! Mike's off ! :o :D
(On what I have no idea) ;D ;D ;D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/08/03 at 00:18 a.m.
The Queen would be so proud! She would think she had found a brother! :)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/08/03 at 00:19 a.m.
before the sodas....Billy stood there unhappy..because now his house had exploded, and his plan to find out the true gender of the hobbits had been ruined....Malcolm was pretty mad too.......it was then me and Malcolm decided that the only way to find out the true gender of the hobbits is to send Royce into the steam room with them just like in that episode of Seinfeld lol
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/08/03 at 00:20 a.m.
Union was once again left out and drew pictures of clocks again...Indy joined him this time...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/08/03 at 00:26 a.m.
Those clocks weren't dripping over tree branches, were they? A la Dali?
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/08/03 at 01:06 a.m.
Quoting:
Those clocks weren't dripping over tree branches, were they? A la Dali?
End Quote
lol...not just yet...its teh beginning of Union's career as an artist...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/08/03 at 01:11 a.m.
And now, Meriadoc and Peregrin are going to bed! (Separately, unfortunately! ::) ) Goodnight sweet oreos... :P
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/08/03 at 01:19 a.m.
good night ma...ah, la...ah people! ;D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: karen (Guest) on 06/08/03 at 05:42 p.m.
Tune in tomorrow for the next exciting instalment.
Will Billy's house ever be rebuilt?
Will we ever find out who stole the oreos?
Did the explosion really kill the paraflugiaglaxic?
All this and less tomorrow
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/08/03 at 05:45 p.m.
Perhaps if the Florios paid more attention to the hobbits' posting styles they would be able to figure out the hobbits' gender and identity once and for all ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Indy Gent on 06/08/03 at 06:32 p.m.
But, alas, the Florios were thinking with a body part other than their brains, so they still couldn't figure it out because they were stuck inside a glass partition. As for Rice Cube, he was still pining for Queen AmenRa and the Mystic to return.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/08/03 at 10:28 p.m.
Rice Cube had miracleously survived the crash of the Anteater, only to be tragically suffering from Amnesial Grandularic Delusions (the dreaded AGD symdrome), which caused him to be under the impression that he had somehow solved a great mystery all on his own... ::) And sadly for him, the Intergalactic Bank had other, bigger, meaner paraflugiaglax bill collectors and the Federated IG Bank was now suing him for 3 times the amount of the bad electrotoggle check.
After the explosion, Mikey was discovered by a wandering Salvidore Dali impersonator, who handed him a scholarship to a prestigeous artschool (provided of course, that he could properly render a suitable likeness of a mouse wearing a hat from the inside cover of the matchbook his Daliness was carrying).
Billy decided to join the hobbits in their never-ending search for kinky sex, and Indy tagged along with his journal, so that he could accurately report each incident... And so off to Toronto they journeyed.... :P
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/09/03 at 07:20 p.m.
Wow, Merry, you sure do like to hurt Rice cube... ;)
Well Union, actually Mikey now again, attended this school, and found out from his teacher that the key to happiness lies in the highest place possible...so then he passed around teh spray paint. Mikey took this literally and decided he was gonna climb Mt Everest. He bought his supplies from a sports store and decided to start up tomarow...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/09/03 at 07:44 p.m.
It was at this point that Rice Cube realized that the hobbits had mistaken the reject crack cocaine stash for the pipeweed, which would explain Merry's psychedelic fantasies of Rice Cube's untimely demise ;)
Meanwhile, Rice Cube decided that Rice Cube should probably not talk of himself in the third person ::)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Indy Gent on 06/09/03 at 08:21 p.m.
With Rice Cube out of the picture, the hobbits took Malcolm and Royce and wrapped them together with cellophane after a anchovy crusted pizza fling. Royce's husband was watching the LBT on the telly. Just then, his jaws dropped and he starting to shake. "Oh no! That bowling ball! It's my wife!! And best friend!!" :o
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/09/03 at 08:46 p.m.
"Not at all" Merry told Mikey. "You know that old saying - 'you only hurt the ones you love...'" And that would require at least a pair of handcuffs which I seem to be lacking at this moment as they were left behind in the honeymoon suite during the flight from the wayward electotoggle and the wrath of the Queen.
And Rice should know (being in the know as he is) that Pippin never touches pipeweed.... ;) Merry on the other hand, might not be adverse to a toke from time to time.... :P
And alas, it seems to be Indy who has cruelly banished Rice this time from the frolicking foursome fun. It would appear that our excellent journalist is taking good notes (and possibly videos and other photographic anomalies...)
But where have you gone Billy Boy?
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Indy Gent on 06/09/03 at 09:12 p.m.
As it turned out, Meridoc banished Rice because she has drempt of his demise. Indy was just a fall guy for the cunning hobbits. Rice Cube did bowl a 300 with the Malcolm-Royce bowling ball, to the horror of the Florios.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/09/03 at 09:29 p.m.
everyone then realized that their entire life was based around sex or finding out the sex of Merr-Pippen...
then Mikey realized that he's the only one who realized that, and, once again feeling left out, he started to draw clocks, but then found his oreos under the table...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/09/03 at 09:31 p.m.
Billy was under the impression we were going to Toronto.......but then, he though, why on earth would he want to go to Toronto..especially without a sergical mask? ...so, the trip to toronto was called off (and Merry and Pippin were sad)
anyway, so the trip in search of kinky sex turned to the city of fountains instead...to Rome we go.....
Michael on the other hand, was denied a plane ticket, because there is an age limit in Rome
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/09/03 at 09:35 p.m.
but then he got in by sneaking into a violin case...he didnt have to pay either :P
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/09/03 at 11:45 p.m.
(Terribly sorry old chap, but my fellow thread posters keep insisting I must kill you.... Or is the voices in my head.... ::) )
As Rice hit the 300, applause erupted from all sides. Bowing, the Fearless Cubed One again picked up the Maloyce ball to show his continued prowess in the next round of the 48 hour bowling tournament. But then disaster struck! As he released the ball, the trapped spirits of Mal and Royce clamped shut on his fingers and he was catapulted down the lane towards the pins. Hitting them head first, the erstwhile Anteater Captain was knocked unconscious. Before the stunned crowd could react, the deadly pin setting machine with it's razor sharp edges began to descend...
Meanwhile, on the plane to Rome, Meriadoc sipped some fine chablis while Pippin and Billy discussed the Mile High Club in hushed tones. Indy, having the audacity to refer to Merry as 'she' was banished to the luggage compartment for his ever so obvious error. The charming and precocious Mikey then took over the laborious note taking process, insuring that they woold ale bee unredabul wen vued lader... ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/10/03 at 08:41 a.m.
Alright, I see how it is...
Seeing as Rice Cube was protected by the aura of the Green Lantern power ring (which is now empowered against yellow, so don't even go there), the razor-sharp pin-resetter was repelled and dismantled by the green energies and the Cube's latent willpower.
It would seem that Indy had revealed a secret that, if the Oreos were observant enough, would open a rather large can of worms ;D
As for Billy, his mouth dropped open and his tongue flapped out "Mask"-style as his stewardess, Avril Lavigne, spread his legs and cradled his chin in her hands in preparation for the lap dance of his life....
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/10/03 at 10:17 a.m.
Quoting:
It would seem that Indy had revealed a secret that, if the Oreos were observant enough, would open a rather large can of worms ;D
End Quote
I think Billy is much more observant than you think..he did notice this, but let it pass because Indygent had had way too much wine
Quoting:
As for Billy, his mouth dropped open and his tongue flapped out "Mask"-style as his stewardess, Avril Lavigne, spread his legs and cradled his chin in her hands in preparation for the lap dance of his life....
End Quote
Billy was very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very happy! ;D
He then started discussing the mile-high club with Avril, and then disapeared to the bathroom with her.... "this made the trip all worth it" Billy said in his head
meanwhile, Merry looked at the journel Michael was taking Indygents notes in, and found it was now filled with drawings of clocks lol
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/10/03 at 10:20 a.m.
And as Billy and Avril shook in the throes of passion inside the aircraft's not-so-roomy lavatory, the whole plane rocked back and forth, creating a ripple in the space-time continuum...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/10/03 at 10:20 a.m.
my post is there, but why doesnt it show...hmmmmm
edited: ok, now its there..forget I said anything lol (about it not being there)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/10/03 at 10:31 a.m.
...and from the void of space came a younger Debbie Gibson! Poor Billy...what was he to do? Shall he choose one...or the other...or both?
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/10/03 at 11:56 a.m.
Unfortunately, the void in the space time continuum caused the plane to become too unstable. Both wings snapped off and it began to plunge towards the ocean. Since the stewardess was still busy with Billy in the plane's lavatory, Merry, Pippin and Mikey had to locate their own life vests and remove their seat backs to be used as flotation devices all by themselves with no help. "Good thing we are sitting right next to the emergency exit" murmered Merry. Draining the last of his chablis, Merry looked out of the window and saw that there was a small island not far from where the plane was going to hit the waves. Handing Billy's lifejacket and seat cushion to Mikey, Meriadoc pushed him in the direction of the plane's still quivering lavatory. "Hurry, there is not much time." Merry slipped the notepad with the drawings of clocks and the mis-spelled notes into a small plastic airsickeness bag to protect it from the wet and slid it into Pippin's front pocket, which cause Pippin to raise his eyebrows meaningfully. "Later!" snapped Merry, "We have a whole island by the looks of things..."
But poor Indy was still trapped in the luggage hold! Seeing Mikey returning from the rear of the plane with Billy and the dazed Avril in tow, Merry had a brilliant idea. Snatching the notepad back out of Pippin's front pocket (which caused him to again raise his eyebrows), Merry thrust it at Mikey and directed: "Desinnez moi un mouton.. er... un escalier!" Mikey, being a clever sort, immediately comprehended the situation and doodled a small but elaborate staircase which then became corporeal and settled nicely into the plane's bottom. A panicked Indy emerged from the darkness. Snatching the one remaining life vest that Rice, Avril and Debbie were all fighting over ("How did Rice end up on the plane anyway?" mused Merry), Merry thrust it over Indy's head and the fivesome pulled open the emergency exit and jumped into the blue ocean....
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/10/03 at 12:01 a.m.
While Rice pondered why Merry would want Mike to draw a sheep of all things, he decided that fighting over the life vest was not worth it and instead had the two pop stars wrap their legs and arms around his body as his magic green energies swooped them to the island below.
Rice then created a large green yacht, as that was his favorite color (color schemes be damned!) and whisked the two ladies onto the deck and on into the sunset...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/10/03 at 12:02 a.m.
Oh yeah, and Rice promises to send help ;D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Banasy on 06/10/03 at 12:09 a.m.
Hmmm.....more like Rice needs help! ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/10/03 at 05:18 p.m.
hmmmmm....Merry, you put the notepad into HIS pocket.....hmmmmm
As Billy jumped with the others, he yelled "wait, Avril, come back!"......"I never got her phone number!...dang'it!"
Pippin then hit Billy and told him to never use the word "Dang'it" again.........
meanwhile, the 5 of them landed on the island just in time to see the plane crash into the water......
"well" Michael said, "I guess well need to organize some way to survive"....Indygent looked around and found a conch laying on the ground.."ok, this is what well do, who ever has the conch can speak"..."That might work" Merry said..."thats if William Golding doesnt sue us!".......we then determined that Indygent would not get the conch again lol
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/10/03 at 05:33 p.m.
you know what the funny thing is...Avril was a stewardess who gave lap dances here......in about 10 years thats exactly where she WILL be lol
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Indy Gent on 06/10/03 at 05:52 p.m.
Indy said, "Who needs a conch when I have this bevy of beautiful naked girls?" The obviously jealous Billy pushed Avril from a nearby cliff and started to run toward Indy's entourage. Meridoc and Perigrin tried to pull Billy by the arm, but his mind was too cluttered. Meanwhile, Rice Cube and Banasy were eating a mutton dinner.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Grendle on 06/10/03 at 06:19 p.m.
Ummmm..... I am confused! Can anybody answer the following:
1. If the fivesome jumped over the ocean, armed with only seat backs and life perservers, how did they land safely on an island?
2. How did Rice and Avril end up on the island if they were sailing away on a yacht?
3. Where did Indy find a bevy of naked girls when everyone has been addressed as "he"?
4. How did they cook the mutton so fast?
There seem to be some serious plot deficiencies here! :o
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Indy Gent on 06/10/03 at 06:27 p.m.
Don't take it so seriously. We want to have as many continuity errors as we can. That's the beauty of the story threads.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Grendle on 06/10/03 at 06:39 p.m.
Oh okay. I just hope none of you are screen writers or anything! You'd starve to death... ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/10/03 at 06:47 p.m.
Quoting:
Ummmm..... I am confused! Can anybody answer the following:
1. If the fivesome jumped over the ocean, armed with only seat backs and life perservers, how did they land safely on an island?
End Quote
The life preservers were actually Gadget-coats which expanded and allowed the peeps to float safely to the island. The seat backs turned into surfboards :)
Quoting:
2. How did Rice and Avril end up on the island if they were sailing away on a yacht?End Quote
Billy paid Rice an undisclosed sum of money so he could continue to have his way with Avril in what was left of the aircraft's lavatory ::) And you know how much Rice loves the green ;D
Quoting:
3. Where did Indy find a bevy of naked girls when everyone has been addressed as "he"?End Quote
After drinking multiple Jagermeister shots, Indy was suffering from really BAD beer goggle syndrome.
Quoting:
4. How did they cook the mutton so fast?End Quote
Rice Cube used his power ring to make a Lean Mean Grilling Machine, but even leaner and meaner than ol' George's ;)
Quoting:
There seem to be some serious plot deficiencies here! :o
End Quote
Makes it more fun ;D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/10/03 at 07:08 p.m.
"Theres no food!" Mikey said returning from the search with Indy. "Dangit!" Billy said, and Indy punched him in the face. "Now what are we supposed to do?" Merry questioned, Mikey thought, then came up with an answer, "Ill draw some food!" He said, "I dont want food made from grafite!" Pippen answered suddenly. "Ill use a pen then!" Mikey answered, Pippen knodded.
Meanwhile, Rice Cube wondered off into the jungle. To die. In the rain. Alone.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/10/03 at 07:10 p.m.
Quoting:
Oh okay. I just hope none of you are screen writers or anything! You'd starve to death... ;)
End Quote
well, actully, part of my current freelance comedy writing involves me writing movie scripts....lol, but dont worry, they make sense..and green lantern is no where to be found lol........(and Im only freelance again till september)
anyway, im not starving to death...yet..I do have another job lol
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/10/03 at 07:11 p.m.
Hmmm...Rice Cube, being adverse to dying, decided he'd rather steal Avril back for a couple hours instead... ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/10/03 at 07:13 p.m.
Quoting:
The life preservers were actually Gadget-coats which expanded and allowed the peeps to float safely to the island. The seat backs turned into surfboards :)
Billy paid Rice an undisclosed sum of money so he could continue to have his way with Avril in what was left of the aircraft's lavatory ::) And you know how much Rice loves the green ;D
After drinking multiple Jagermeister shots, Indy was suffering from really BAD beer goggle syndrome.
Rice Cube used his power ring to make a Lean Mean Grilling Machine, but even leaner and meaner than ol' George's ;)
Makes it more fun ;D
End Quote
all the secrets are revealed now..its like the E! true hollywood story..or behind the music
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/10/03 at 07:16 p.m.
Quoting:
Meanwhile, Rice Cube wondered off into the jungle. To die. In the rain. Alone.
End Quote
just like Ernest Hemingway.....
anyway, Rice didnt die, he actully though of something...in the plane there is food, but we need some way to get to the food...we need someone wo could swim and get it.......we all thought and the least needed person was sent to get the food....sorry Debbie Gibson, but I cant stand your music......
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/10/03 at 07:20 p.m.
Merry then turned to Pippin and said "you know what would be fun...since Indygent is so drunk and thinks that there are many many naked women around him...we should pretend to be these women and then have our way with Indy"....Pippin turned to Merry and said "I like that idea, but we have to first eat some of this delicious mutton that Rice had cooked"..it was then that Merry realized that Pippin had had too much wine as well
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Peregrin on 06/10/03 at 08:22 p.m.
Pippin spoke at last and stated :
"Ye who drinketh the last of the wine shall be therefore entitled to have seconds with Avril, as she has tired of the Florios, and is not inclinedeth towards anteaters".
At this point Rice screamed and his outburst caused him to rend his garment.
IndyGent said "Have no fear, I bet you didn't know I am also a seamstress?"
Everyone stopped and stared.....
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/10/03 at 08:26 p.m.
Little did the hobbit know that Rice had the power to render himself temporarily helmetesque ;) But only temporarily!
Still, 'tis quite a wild ride ;D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Peregrin on 06/10/03 at 08:35 p.m.
Malcolm Higgins (where did he come from) piped and said "I'd like to see that" :o
Then everyone stared at him instead ! :P
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/10/03 at 09:06 p.m.
hey, I never got to do anything with Avril!
Anyway, Mikey and a drunk Indy came up with a plan to remove the pants of both Merry and Pippen, so that the answer could be known for all, but when Mikey told Indy to go on as planned, he ran towards the ocean, and yelled as loud as possible, "I am not a Vegitarian!!!!" Everyone just stared as Indy ran off into the night.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/10/03 at 10:23 p.m.
Merry looked about at the chaos and realized that of all the basic human (or hobbit) drives, only one of the five was bound to solve itself... The others needed attended to.
Picking up the conch, he blew a plaintive shivery note, and immediately the other members of the party lapsed into a hypnotic trance. Merry began to give orders.
"Billy! Collect some grass and bamboo and begin making us some huts!"
"Indy! Scout around the island for a source of fresh water and any edible fruits and berries."
"Avril! Take Rice into the woods and keep him occupied!"
"Michael! Dessinez moi les menottes...."
Holding the conch securely, Merry lead Pippin over to a quiet spot under a palm tree, where the quarter bottle of Chablis rested forgotten. And they snuggled down together to watch the work progress....
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: XenaKat13 on 06/10/03 at 11:08 p.m.
As the hobbits settled down to "supervise" the others...they heard a distinctly female voice in the tree above them....
"Ooooo!!! Hobbits! Two of them! I've been sooo lonely here alone on this island. With no men. By myself.
And all this delicious food and wine.
"Come up to my treehouse you two handsome hobbits! The beds here are warm and comfortable," the scantily-clad lady said. "and I'm ever so lonely by myself."
Merry and Pippin were shocked. they thought they were finally alone, and free of the distractions of the sex-obsessed others.
"I am XenaKat...but you two may call me Kat. I loooove hobbits...and I promise I will not tell the others your secrets."
Merry said "well....we hadn't planned to..."
"Food? Did she say she had food?" Pippen asked..
"Oh yes....and I make a lovely sweet drink from kola nuts...and it won't intoxicate you or make you say or do anything stupid." XenaKat said..."and no headache or regrets the morning after."
"Hmmm. I must try this sweet drink." said Pippen. And with that the hobbit began climbing the palm tree.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/10/03 at 11:48 p.m.
Billy returned from getting the huts made "wow that went quick" Billy said.....he walked over to where Merry and Pippin were so lazily resting....."what the hell? are you guys/girls exempt?"........he then saw xena kat...who are you?"
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/10/03 at 11:50 p.m.
"hey, where did Avril go?"......"and where's Rice?"........
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/11/03 at 00:02 a.m.
"Ah look!" Meriadoc said to Billy, pointing up the palm tree, while silmultaneously hooking his hand thru Pippin's belt and pulling him back down to the ground. "There is a lovely lady up there who has anot seen a man in years...."
Billy smiled, forgetting all about Avril and took a step toward the tree....
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/11/03 at 00:21 a.m.
"Ooh...a girl that hasnt seen a man in years"......Billy thought of so many dirty ways to end this thought, but decided that it wasnt appropiate.......lol, so he started to climb up the tree to learn more about this girl who hasnt seen a man in years........
man, its a jungle here
dang'it, I let a dirty joke through lol
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Billy_Florio on 06/11/03 at 00:23 a.m.
I must ask...what happened to Debbie Gibsons quest for the food on the plane?
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Peregrin on 06/11/03 at 06:03 a.m.
Debbie Gibson was last seen being eaten by the flight crew, and very tasty she was too :o
Meanwhile Billy enjoyed his climb so much he shimmied straight past XenaKat, who was soon heard to exclaim "I've seen a lovely bunch of coconuts" :o :o
The Anteater and the Seamstress ambled underneath and tried to look inconspicuous as they stared upwards, shamelessly :-/
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/11/03 at 10:34 a.m.
Rice wondered when Avril switched careers from stewardess to seamstress, but took it in stride...
Meanwhile, Billy was scrounging for more Monopoly money to try to bribe Rice into getting another turn with Avril, and maybe even have Mike join in on the fun....
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Syncronos on 06/11/03 at 11:26 a.m.
;D
Out of the sky drops Syncronos!!
he gets up, looks around, and says, "I wonder where my buddy Rice Cube is...I want some egg rolls!"
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/11/03 at 11:30 a.m.
"Egg rolls, you say? Let's see what Avril and I can cook up with our Lean Mean Green Grilling Machine ;D"
Magically, the LMGGM morphed into the Great Green Wok of Zen, which produced the finest egg rolls that Syncronos (or anybody else, for that matter) had ever tasted. So yummy was the egg roll, so aromatic the smell, that the peeps eagerly awaiting threatened to douse the flames of the Wok with their drool.
And in the end, everyone was satisfied, and Rice went back to making sweet sweet love to Avril while Billy and Mike sat back, jealous of Rice's Asian persuasion.
"Well, that's one way to work off this meal" said Avril between gasps for air...
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: XenaKat13 on 06/11/03 at 12:09 a.m.
"My my such a disappointment" said Xenakat. "It's no wonder I've sworn off "men" and switched to hobbits".
Having caused Billy and Mike to be hypnotised into watching Rice and Avril with her magic hypno-gourd, Xenakat jumped down from the tree to talk to the hobbits.
"Now whyever in the world would this hobbit be so eager to taste my magic elixir?" she said to Perigrin. "Patience is a virtue, O excitable one".
And with that she swept up Merry in a wild embrace. ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Syncronos on 06/11/03 at 12:14 a.m.
???
Sworn off men for hobbits?
I missed a whole bunch of meetings, didn't I?
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: XenaKat13 on 06/11/03 at 01:13 p.m.
Quoting:
???
Sworn off men for hobbits?
I missed a whole bunch of meetings, didn't I?
End Quote
Just to clarify, that's sworn off "men" as in human men....in favor of hobbits of any and all genders. ;) ;)
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Rice_Cube on 06/11/03 at 02:37 p.m.
But Rice would not give up so quickly...though he was having much fun with Avril, he would also try his best to unleash the Green Lantern Surprise so that XenaKat would come back into his control...oh yes...the Kat shall purr tonight...
;D
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Mike_Florio on 06/11/03 at 07:44 p.m.
Union Jack had arrived since it was night fall...and so he was digging on the beach for treasure, oh yeah, and he was drunk...then Mikey walked up to Indy, "Give me back my costume!" He said, "no!" Indy answered, "theres treasure somewhere on this island!" "Ok, then why do you need to wear my costume while looking for it?" Mikey answered, Indy just looked up and peed his pants..."you want it back?" He asked, "you keep it!" Mikey said backing away.
Subject: Re: New Store E.
Written By: Meriadoc on 06/11/03 at 10:36 p.m.
Quoting:
Union Jack had arrived since it was night fall...and so he was