inthe00s
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Subject: Story again

Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/23/04 at 1:44 pm

Join in if ya like!


Once upon a time, there was a great QueenAmenRa, who lived happily in Penguin Land with all the other penguins.  But one day, she just sort of...wandered off and she got lost.  When she finally found her way back home, things were...different.  Different indeed.  Penguin Land seemed to have gone under some reconstruction, making it diffeicult for her to find her way around. 
"Hello?" she called out.  "Is anybody here?"  She search everywhere for her penguin friends, hoping they would nicely repsond to her new story thread.  "Well," she said to herself, "there's only one way to find out who will contribute."  So she picked up the remote and...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Bobo on 04/23/04 at 1:49 pm

..it turned out that Bobo, her bestest friend in the whole whole world, was hiding behind the place she was looking.

He, shocked at the reconstruction of Penguinland, was very glad to hear that everyone was going to contribute to the new thread.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/23/04 at 6:37 pm

But someone had to tell RockandRollFan, the Florios and Lanie that Penguinland was moved from Greenland County to the Gray township. And since the old Greenland site was just sitting there idle with the whatfreaks.com ghost town, many of the recent newbies would riot in the streets. The Queen had to collude with ChuckyG to make a decision: to either write to everyone of the relocation or to leave them alone and send them copies of "Who Moved My Cheese?" 

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: CatwomanofV on 04/23/04 at 8:05 pm

Chucky then had to consult his chief adviser, Hairspray. "What shall we do, Hairspray?" he asked. "How to we keep the newbies from rioting?" "Throw a party" responded Hairspray. Chucky thought about this idea for a few minutes and then thought it was a great idea. "We can hold a 'grand opening' for the new and improved Penguinland. We can invite...."




Cat

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/23/04 at 11:47 pm

Hairspray and the Queen were setting up plans for the party. Hairspray would police for potential trolls, and the Queen, the Mystic, and David Boreanez would hire the maitenance crew. CatwomanofV, Bobo and My name is Kenny would monitor the guest list. The Queen suggested that all guests were charged $40 a pop to attend, with $6.00 beers. But the committee struck down that suggestion, but did sell alciholic beverages for 3 bucks.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Bobo on 04/24/04 at 1:34 am

As guests were piling through the door, Cat, Bobo, and Kenny were naturally busy collecting the entrance fees.

Queen struck a theatrical pose, as was her proclivity. "Th.. That should be forty dollars!" she shrieked. There were reasons for this, of course, as the profits from the previous years' parties were virtually non-existant.

The man who had come through the door, obviously angry at this misunderstanding, picked Bobo up by the ankle and roared his response.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/24/04 at 11:15 am

"...Don't you know the Dewey-Decimal System?"  he shouted.

"NO!" the Queen screamed.  "No barbarians allowed."  However, she was completely oblivious to the fact that one certain barbarian had snuck in...it was none other than...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Bobo on 04/24/04 at 11:19 am

"Hey! Conan!" Bobo shouted.

Conan the Barbarian. What a cliché, thought the Queen, not daring to say it out loud.

The Queen, ready in all her might and power to save Bobo from what would be certain death, had to make one of the most important decisions of all.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/25/04 at 2:05 am

The Queen finally saved Bobo from Conan's clutches by swinging on a stripper's pole and sticking her stillettos in the Barbarian's skull. Bobo thanked the Queen for all her help, to which the Queen replied "Whatever, now don't bother me hile I'm dancing to "Disco Inferno"". So everyone continued with their party responsibilities as if nothing happen, which never does happen in Penguinland. In fact, Philbo was hurling his pints just as Cat and Don Carlos were renewing their vows.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Bobo on 04/25/04 at 2:11 am

Bobo poured himself a tropical drink, remembering how lucky he was to have been rescued.

The Queen felt really happy that Bobo had been taught the Dewey decimal system. His skills in that field were now many and plentiful, and, with many thanks due to his close shave with that certain barbarian, she knew that she could trust him in the job which she was about to put him up to.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/25/04 at 2:23 am

But then Dewey Decimal himself came up to Bobo and told him, "If you had a library card that you could make holds on, check on any overdue books, and request new material, you would need to use a stupid numbering system like mine." The Queen was very upset and called the Royal Guards to kick Dewey out of her party. Then she ordered the voluptuous maids to clean up after Philbo. Philbo smiled after the maids had done there royal duties.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Bobo on 04/25/04 at 2:27 am

Bobo had to double take for a minute. He knew that the Dewey Decimal system couldn't actually talk. It must have been some kind of dream.

But no, this was no dream. The Queen was indeed upset about Dewey attempting to hurt Bobo, and Bobo tried in his way to attempt to console her.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/25/04 at 2:32 am

The Queen was just happy that she doesn't have to deal with a faker like Dewey Decimal and that his system still lived on. Bobo shook off the Dewey incident to wipe the Queen's tears. Meanwhile, NbC was standing by asking questions about when Bo was going to "pop the Question" to Her Royal Highness. "I'm just a ****ing commoner.", answered Bobo. "The Queen is so far above me." The Queen chimed in, "Yes, Bobo, you are far below me. But that doesn't mean I would say no to a Royal marriage."

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Bobo on 04/25/04 at 2:46 am

(Off topic: LOL! How can I follow that!)

Onto the scene then popped... Jordan Domoslai. She, unimpressed that Bobo had decided to give his hand in marriage to the Queen, walked away. Her tears were unsuppressed, yet she promised that she would attend the marriage.

While Bobo was still attempting to comprehend this caste system which the Queen was employing, she was still wondering if she and Bobo were ever going to get married.

NbC was just looking at the event, attempting to decide what the best solution would be for all the involved parties.

"Parties?" Bobo questioned. His screeds of anagrams were not lost from his brain as he reeled them off in quick succession. "TRAIPSE PARTIES PIASTRE PRATIES PIASTER PIRATES PASTIER".

Queen, again, was impressed. "This," she said, holding back tears. "This is why I'm marrying him. He's so wonderful!"

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/25/04 at 5:53 pm

Bobo couldn't help but do cartwheels after she said yes. Jordan Domoslai, who was so obscure he didn't even know who he was, left the party. Then the Queen turned to Bobo and gave him this ultimatum: "You must only say those tongue twisters and nothing more. You may also recite the entire Dewey Decimal System, but that's it." Bobo agreed with these demanding but do-able orders. Meanwhile, Philbo, totally ignored by everyone while upchucjing some Peppermint Schnapps, raised a toast to the lucky royal couple. But after seeing chunks of pheasant feathers in his mouth, most of the Queen's guest fled to the gates. That is except for Absolutely Vile, who was turned on by Phil's chutzpah. 

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/25/04 at 7:49 pm

Who to arrive to save the day but our good friend Othello, who had returned from his Italian shopping spree.  At the sight of the Queen with Bobo, he immediately burst into tears and fled.  The Queen, equally upset, ran out of the room to find out what Othello had bought for her.  Bobo, saddened and quite perplexed by this peculiar event, turned to Indy Gent.
"Why is this happening?" he asked.
"Well," IG replied, "apparently they were still seeing each other on the side."
"But...but...who is that man?"
"Oh, just some lad from Venice."
"...Ahh...California..." 

Meanwhile the Queen was out in the lobby making promises to Othello that she would call off the marriage as long as he showed her what was in his shopping bags...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/25/04 at 8:14 pm

Just then, the Queen came from her boudoir and told Bobo the news. "Othello was crying because his BMW conked out in front of the palace. I had to tell him that I didn't want a man who only loved his material possessions, so I shot him dead instead." At this point, she frenched Bobo, who smiled intently. "What are we going to do with the body, Queen?", Bobo inquired. "I guess Indy and Rice Cube will have to throw him into the Royal Receptical.", the Queen answered. As Othello's body was being ditched, Grendle the Dragon had incinerated the rest of the guests that were still there, except for Phil and AV, who the other guests had ignored up until "The Toast". 

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Bobo on 04/25/04 at 11:59 pm

At this moment, there was no keeping Bobo from his wild string of emotions.

Though he was very happy that the Queen had disposed of Othello, he was also a smidgeon confused as to the method of doing so. Indy and Rice Cube were approaching to dispose of the body, and in one last show of passionate emotion, The Queen emitted a long, strained moan, and a tear at her departed friend. She had to admit being saddened. But since this gave her more time to keep her eyes on the elusive Bobo, she was not at all worried that this would interrupt her reign.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/26/04 at 9:37 am

Then Indy and Rice, disheartened by the sudden display of emotion, placed Othello's deprecating body on the royal pedestal for the Queen to look at one last time. Bobo then had a change of heart. "I think you should marry Othello. It is obvious you still love him." "Oh Bobo, thank you." was the Queens answer. She then summoned Dr. Frankenstein and Igor to revived her true love." However, this was blocked by Iago, who still had a thing for the Queen and didn't want his archrival resuscitated. "Darn you, Iago!", Bobo and the Queen cried in unison.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/26/04 at 1:25 pm

"No! It's ok!" said Iago.  "I'm here to help.  I know just what to do to bring him to life."  Everyone present ignorantly believed him and left him alone to do his work. 
Iago walked up to the body and began to sob. 
"OH OTHELLO! WHY?! WHY?! *gulp*  We were supposed to be friends forever...and ever.  You were supposed to be my roommate!  We...we shared EVERYTHING together.  And now you want to leave me for her? *gulp* OH OTHELLO!" 
Well, anyway, he decided to get busy and bring his friend back to live.  However, he played an evil trick on the Queen by making Othello forget ALL of his Shakespeare.  In fact, all he could do now was get high and sing "Puttin On the Ritz!"

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/26/04 at 7:15 pm

The Queen, angered by this trick, summoned Dr. Frankenstein to switch Iago's and Othello's brains and make O the smart one. "As you wish", Dr. Frank answered in a sinister tone. Igor then electrocuted Iago and the two carried the bodies to Frank's lab. Bobo followed closely. A big mistake, for when the Doctor pulled the levers to the mind-switching machine, Iago sang "Puttin' On The Ritz", Othello spoke in tongue twisters, and Bobo had Iago's evil brain. Fortunately, Bobo still had the mind to barter with Adagio the Royal barber, for his cloned brain. So Bobo and Adagio had the same cutting skills, and Iago's was flushed in the Royal commode. 

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Meriadoc on 04/26/04 at 10:58 pm

And as everyone knows, a Royal flush beats every other hand, which meant that Iago now held the ascendancy in the party. He summoned Desdemona, who looked ravishing, altho' a bit blue around the face from being summarily strangled. She brought with her her sidekicks, the sex-crazed gay hobbits and a couple of sloths.

"Where's Marian?" shouted Desdemona. "She must be put on trial for giving away the location of the secret club house to the penguin masses..."

Meanwhile, Meriadoc perked up his ears as he heard a familiar sort of shuffling sound.

"Oh no!" he exclaimed, pointing toward the woods where the trees were beginnning to quiver. But no one paid any attention, and therefore all but Merry were caught off guard when the paraflugiaglax emerged from the wood, red-faced, out of breath and irate, still clutching the bad check given to him by Rice for $98, 766, 541, 111 inter-galactic units.

Grendle the dragon, who thought he himself had a good memory, rolled his eyes and shook his head, then flew off to see if Philbo had any Chardonnay.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/27/04 at 10:56 pm

Othello, speaking in tongue twisters, replied, "Meridoc, mother married Martha Margaret Mummert-Montgomery." No one knew exactly what he meant, but Iago had an idea. "I believe he's saying he has an Oedepal complex." Then he thought longer, "No, he's saying I'm a dirty Mother---" Then the hobbits yelled. "Shut yo' mouth." Suddenly, Bobo came to his senses, and killed Iago with one chop in the Adam's apple. Then he swung from a vine and grabbed Desdemonia and fled. Meriadoc was confused by all this commotion and shouted, "A Royal Flush beats everything! I demand adherance to the laws of Penguinland." Then the IPD blazed their sirens and arrested Meriadoc and charge him with illegal gambling. "One officer said, "That may play in Vegas, but not here, Sir!"

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/28/04 at 10:29 am

Meanwhile, the Queen was back at her palace, grief-stricken because her one and only Othello had left her for good.  She was busy planning a party of ice cream and other comfort foods...and of course beer.  But as she was sending her servant off to buy the groceries, she realized that her purse was empty.  Someone had stolen from the all-mighty Queen, and she knew EXACTLY who it was...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/28/04 at 11:10 am

"It was those dastardly hobbits", the Queen huffed. "When I get my Royal hands on those two, I'll give them a Ring, but not the one they want." But Meriadoc was already in the Marion County Lockup, and Perigrine had on his invisible cloak. The Queen decided to calm herself by seeing the movie "Cinderella". Right there, she noticed the very human Cinderella carrying the Queen's purse. "Stop that wench, I order you! She has my purse!", as she pointed to the movie screen. The usher then told her to calm down, she has a Capital One Plus card and could file fraud against Cinderella." "What's credit!?, the Queen sighed.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/29/04 at 1:16 pm

The Queen pondered this, completely unaware that the spirit of her English teacher had crept into her palace.
"GET TO WORK!!!"  he shouted.
This startled the Queen and went to sit down and work on her stupid 24-paragraph essay that was due the next day.  Yet her mind still lingered in Penguin Land. She fell asleep and dreamed of her fun Penguin friends. 
But even her pleasant dream turned horrendous when...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/29/04 at 5:47 pm

She saw her English teacher in Othello's short kilt and tights. She started to bawl, "Why, why am I taking this test instead of shacking with my Penguin friends?!" As her tears began to increase, a salt-watered flood drowned her English teacher, who was also responsible for the dull, boring Maude Sigafoos stories that bored her to tears. The Queen saw a familiar face holding his hand out for her. It was Bobo, who cried out, "Your Highness, I didn't know what I was thinking when I made that mind switching thing. I was depressed, I didn't know what to do." Trying not to make light of a serious subject matter, the Queen declared, "You missed watching 'Friends' to save me. You deserve many medals, riches, the crown." "No I don't want any of those material things. I just want my sanity back." So the Queen summoned the Mystic to wave her magic wand and Bobo was back to his normal self.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: QueenAmenRa on 04/30/04 at 1:00 pm

Then the Queen awoke, feeling quite rested and happy.  Better yet, her hands had typed a perfect essay while she was asleep and dreaming of Penguins.  But when she brought it to her professor, he took one glance at it and yelled, "I TOLD YOU NO MORE WRITING ABOUT FLUFFY!"  The Queen was very confused.  She looked at her own paper and could not believe her eyes.
"BOBO! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?" she screamed in terror.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 04/30/04 at 4:45 pm

The Queen found out, too late, that Fluffy was a nickname for Bobo, and that he and the professor were gay lovers. "Omigod!", cried The Queen. "I cannot believe Bobo would betray me like this. I'll have his head for this" All of a sudden, a large pole with a spiggot at the end came toward the Queen, while voices in her head kept saying, "Suck, Suck!" The Queen would not have anything to do with sucking anything, so she ran toward the nearest taxi and ordered the driver to take her home. However, the taxi was actually a Yugo. The driver said, "I'll get you there in 3 hours." "But I'm only 3 miles away.", cried the Queen. "IT'S A YUGO", clarified the driver.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: CatwomanofV on 05/02/04 at 2:52 pm

Queen thought that she was better off by walking, she told the taxi driver, "no thanks. I think I will walk." She started down the street as fast as she could. She kept looking behind her to see if she was being followed. There was a dark figure behind her that she couldn't make out who it was. The faster she ran, the faster the dark figure moved to catch up to her. She didn't know what to do. Suddenly....



Cat

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 05/02/04 at 8:42 pm

The Queen decided once and for all who this stranger was. So she hid under the bushes and tripped over her stalker. She pull of his mask to revel in was Perigrin, Meridoc's partner in crime. "Police!", yelled the Queen. "I order you to arrest this man." They did exactly that, putting Perigrin in the same cell as Meridoc. Meanwhile, Nally was pruning the royal rose garden when he noticed the Queen, exhausted and beat. He then asked where Rio Rhodes was. The Queen didn't answer, choosing instead to relieve Nally of his duties to see one if Rio's strip shows.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Peregrin on 05/02/04 at 10:14 pm

Peregrin, enchanted at being re-united with Meriadoc in the Marian County Jail, asked the warden if he could possibly see his way clear to have have a chilled bottle of Chardonnay and two glasses delivered forthwith to the cell.

The evil warden replied that you will need more than 2 glasses, as he understood that we were shortly to be joined by Bobo, who had just been found guilty of un-natural acts with both the Queen's English Professor AND that Yugo....  :o

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: MLB on 05/03/04 at 4:40 pm

  But that's another story.
  Meanwhile that dashing and generous Indy Gent fell in love with  QueenAmenRa's youngest adopted child who was now 21.  And the Penguinland royal seat was reclaimed once more.
  The Princess and Sir Indy lived on in the Queen's castle after paying for a thorough cleaning and renovations to fit the Princess's ideas of modern decor.
Flowery things flourished in the rose garden!
Rhyming and storytelling flourished in the school room!     
And in the bedroom... oh, a certain little addition to the family was soon to make the royal line of "Gent" flourish and reign for generations.

    Is the child really Gent's?  Is she lying as she's rhyming? Did someone escape jail and sing sweet nothings in her ear before Sir Indy had the pleasure and the priviledge?  And who is this Princess anyway?  Could it be Rapunzel? 
        Find out,  by turning the page!
   

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: QueenAmenRa on 05/03/04 at 7:23 pm

Well, first Indy had to recieve the Queen's approval to marry her daughter.  The Queen said yes, and she had a nice little chat with Indy about...well...just...mother-in-law stuff, I guess.
"Queen," said Indy.  "How is it that you have aged slower than your daughter?"
"Well, you have to do these things when you're Queen, you know." 
Meanwhile at the prison, the 2 hobbits and their warden were awaiting Bobo's arrival.  "Bobo!" shouted Peregrin.  "BOBO!....*ugh* Where could he be?" 
Then there was a knock at the door.  Oh sorry, it's only Barney.
Wait! Another knock.  Barney opened the door to find...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 05/04/04 at 10:13 am

Bobo, beaten to a pulp by Hamlet, Horatio, and Polonius after killing Rosencrantz and Guildenstern in self defense. "I-I-I managed to escape, your Highness," Bobo said weakly. "But I'm afraid I'll be hanged for defending myself." The Queen was overcome with tears. "Oh Bobo, I don't know what to say." So she ordered the guards to take hime to the nurses' station to fix him up. They laid Bobo on the gurney where Othello was healed. Meanwhile, Frodo arrived at the Marion County lockup and asked the guard to see Merry and Pippin. "Sir, I don't think you want to see them now, since...well, I'll show you."

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Ripp on 05/06/04 at 9:58 am

Ripp managed to find the topic and didn't care and went away because she thought it was boring and just said she'd go to Coke Music dot Com.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 05/06/04 at 4:30 pm

Shocked by Ripp's cameo appearance, The Queen ordered her out of the story. Her reply was: "If you can't say anymore, then don't say nothin'." Ripp went to CokeMusicdotcom in disgust. Meanwhile Bobo, patched up with threads and Royal iodine, called out for the Queen because he had a little problem. When the Queen rushed with panic, she asked him what was wrong. Bobo said, "You know why I am like this, your Highness. I know you love Othello so much, but since the series finale of "Friends" is on tonight, I was wandering if you could bring me the Royal TV set." The Queen was preturbed by this request, since she hated "Friends" and that harridan that stole Brad Pitt from her 2 years ago. But seeing Bobo in such pain made her rethink her stance. "Okay, but could you put your hands on the Rachel chick. I don't want to see her." Bobo was willing to compromise. "I'll cup my hands and just see Rache, and you can watch the other cast."

Meanwhile, there were ominous moaning in the Marion County lockup. Frodo shivered frightenly. "It's Gollum!" he yelled.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: CatwomanofV on 05/06/04 at 6:41 pm

"What did they getcha for, Gollum" asked Frodo? "For exposing myself to the Queen" he answered. Frodo could understand this because the thought of Gollum exposing himself to anyone would be very scary. "But now that I have a record", Gollum continued, "I can run for office. I have made friends in the lock-up. I now have the right connections." This really frightened Frodo. He couldn't take it anymore. He ran to the bars on the cell and yelled, "GUARD! GUARD!" Then Frodo was really frightened because who came to cell was none other than.....



Cat

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Zella on 05/06/04 at 10:35 pm

....Zella and Fussbudget, who thought that the hobbits ought to be rescued from their squalid conditions. They saw to it that Frodo was returned to the custody of Samwise, never again to grace the Queen's thread with his presence, and Merry and Pippin were sent off on a secret mission, which was...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: FussBudgetVanPelt on 05/06/04 at 10:44 pm

To go to Cokemusic.com and see if there was any free Coke there.  But there wasn't, so they said "What a RIPPoff".....  >:(

Then, Merry & Pippin were sent by Rosencranz and Gildenstern to secretly spy on the queen for signs of insanity.......

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 05/06/04 at 11:51 pm

Unfortunately, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern were both dead, so Merry and Pippin only succeeded in going insane themselves. Ripp was already stewing from the coke ripoff and Fuss Budget's pun. So she switched to Pepsi. Meanwhile, Bobo and the Queen had just finished watching 'Friends' at the Queen's palace. Of course, the Queen objected to how the Ross/Rachel thing ended. "What would Brad think?" shuddered the Queen. So she called NBC to ask if they could change the finale so that Rachel died, Chandler got stuck with Janice, and Brad Pitt married the Queen?  She summoned 80s rocked and Jessica to kill the "Friends" cast and steal their fortunes. But Rock n Roll fan uncovered the plot, and said "How you doing?" to those two over and over again, killing them instantly.   

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Ripp on 05/27/04 at 11:11 am

Ripp suddenly burst through a magical portal. She stared quite blankly around. Her black wedding-dress style dress trailed behind her, as she neatened her Bushy brunette hair. Her eyes were like diamonds that had lost their sharpness. She had only wanted to go through the door to her School Reunion when she fell through the portal. Noticing then, the havoc in the world, she tried to escape but couldn't, for the portal had sealed. There she was, pale skinned Ripp (real name Amaria *not really, you know what I mean*), her french-english accent calling out to the world, "Help".

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Ripp on 05/27/04 at 11:37 am

(did I mention im half french??)

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Ripp on 05/30/04 at 11:33 am

(COME ON! NOONES REPLYING! REPLY! SOMEONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!)

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Ripp on 06/05/04 at 2:59 pm

Goodbye! I'm never replying to this thread again. EVER!

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Ripp on 09/19/04 at 5:10 pm

(ok take away any other posts than my "Ripp burst through the portal" one.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 09/20/04 at 1:14 am

Indy Gent, realizing that Ripp is turning this thread into her own fantasy trip, decided to get help from the creator of this thread, namely the Queen. The hobbits were no help whatsoever. Meriadoc had just come back from his/her extended vacation. And Peregrin was still in prison. Finally, the Mystic appeared just in time. Indy told her, "Ripp is ruining our story by creating four one-sentence posts. You must conjure up more participants in the story thread, since I have run out of good ideas." The Mystic replied, "I will try to find the Queen for you and they will all reply. Looks like you won't have Ripp to worry about, since she said she wasn't going to reply again." At these words, Ripp reappeared angrily and demanded that the Mystic no longer return. "You should know, stupid minions, that I am a pathological liar. Heh, heh!"

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Ripp on 10/08/04 at 4:33 pm

"Oi!" yelled Ripp "If you must know, I just got really angry at you coz you didn't reply or like me!" Ripp threw a rotten tomato at something, only turning back and noticing it as the queen.
"Oh, sorry!" ripp said truthfully stuffing a chicken pie into her backpack, coz she was going to aim it at the queen. The queen was not amused and ripp offered a piece of pie to make up for it.
"To my dungeons that aren't really dungeons but cardboard and plastic pipes!" yelled the queen.
"Aaaaaa nooo!" yelled Ripp
"Make that 2 years in the cardboard dungeon for not using grammar and full stops!" yelled the queen.
"Oh my good majestic leader!" screamed ripp.
"Don't use my name like that. Bye bye." yelled the queenie. "Oi, i'm not queenie!" screamed idiot queenie. "No! I am not an idiot, either!!!!! 7 years in the cardboard cutout!"

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 10/08/04 at 7:18 pm

As Ripp pondered her incarceration behind cardboard walls, she noticed something: The Queen was too broke for a real dungeon. "Oi", Ripp said. "Maybe she couldn't afford drywall of balsa wood. I should do something." So, she summoned the prison guard Nally to buy some drywall with her own money. He trotted off to the local Home Deppo (they couldn't spell way back then) to look for a spakle blade made of gold. But by the time Ripp was done with her drywall and shellac dungeon, the queen arrived and was none too impressed. "You stupid minion", cried the Queen. "Don't you know drywall is more powerful than cardboard? You just added 2 years to your sentence." At this, the Queen's own cardboard castle came tumbling down.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: MLB on 10/11/04 at 5:17 pm

  "what was that going by the window?", said the queen. "A cow, yer highness" said the handmaid ducking for cover and praying for mercy as the tornado picked up speed and part of the outer wall of the castle's western facing fortress. 
  Ah that's how the cards fall, someone shouted.  And just think, everyone in that flimsy makeshift dungeon will be free if they survive this...for surely the foundation walls will not withstand such a forceful wind and blinding rain as this.
      Oh no! All my efforts sending THOSE people to the dungeon--wasted and foiled by the careless whim of a natural event that no one's ever seen in this part of the world before!" Raged the outraged and scared Queen as she, and others run for the only protected shelter of the heavy stone larder off to the northern wing of the castle with the 2nd kitchen and her personal suite of rooms. 

    Ah, it's a good thing I'm in shape, she mused as she cleared the stairs 2 at a time and made it to the cellar just before the roof began flying away like an angry reader shredding a contradictory letter to thee editor.
But unfortunately, the whole host of persons who took shelter in the cellar are one match short of a warm fire.
  No ventilation! said someone.
Who's the dunce what lit that torch? 
"Yer all careless and touched in the head" shouted the Queen.  And don't forget, NONE OF YOU matter, if I don't survive this!!

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Ripp on 10/16/04 at 5:57 am

Ripp survived and fell on her bum laughing at the queen.
"Ha, ha, ha, ha!" yelled Ripp. "Ha, ha, ha! I survived! But I won't go off destroying everything...I will turn this stone hell into flowers and pretty things! Ha, ha, ha!"

Ripp went galloping off, summoning little magic icy-blue and icy-pink faeries to spread flowers and trees and grass about the land.

"Ohh, nooo!" screamed the Queen. "Anything but this!" Queen got swallowed up by beautiful icy golden flowers.

"Oh, such pretty flowers! Yayyyy!" screamed Ripp, and everyone danced with joy.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Tam on 03/08/05 at 1:46 am

Unbeknown-st to Ripp, the Queen did not die in the flowers. For the Queen recieved more power from the pollen and arose from them and struck Ripp down. Suddenly everything started to fade out of site. Frodo stepped back from the guard and could not believe what had been shown.
"I must go get His and Her Highness, King RockandRollFan and Ktelqueen to come save them" Frodo said
"Mayhap they will also bring their court jester Tam along for some fun"
With that Frodo spun and left to seek the help that was so needed.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Ripp on 03/08/05 at 2:25 pm

((y r u trying to get rid of me??? I didn't say "Queen died and everyone laughed"!!!!!!))

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Philip Eno on 03/08/05 at 2:28 pm

But someone somewhere was not laughing...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Alchoholica on 03/08/05 at 2:34 pm

.. the toys in toytown were upset...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Philip Eno on 03/08/05 at 2:39 pm

...over some disagreement...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Apricot on 03/08/05 at 3:22 pm

... mostly concerning drugs....

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Philip Eno on 03/08/05 at 3:23 pm

...those that can be purchase easily over the counter and...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Alchoholica on 03/08/05 at 5:32 pm

...those that Apricot sells in his lunch break to the 3rd grade kids...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Tam on 03/08/05 at 10:18 pm

But Frodo realized that he had only seen PART of how it had played out. He thought to himself that Ripp surely was not dead. How could that be? Would such drastic measures really be taken? The only way he could know for sure would be to go to the prophet Nally to find out Ripp's final demise.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Alchoholica on 03/09/05 at 4:08 am

She went to see the Prophet and he told her that by donating a mere $5000 to the Prophet Cause she could predict all future events herself. She did so and was about to leave when she heard the clink of bottles. She dived across the table and pulled the mask of the Prophet. Ohmigosh, it was Apricot - seller of drugs to children...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Tam on 03/09/05 at 10:38 am

She was so furious with Apricot! But then she also realized something quite strange.. all the children seemed to resemble Alcoholicas! Not only were the drugs taking over Happy Penguinland, but Alcoholica seemed to be running loose - spreading vile and corruption among the youth.
"How can this be possible?" she wondered aloud.
"I've got to stop Alcoholica now too??"
Then a thought occured to her. She knew how to get rid of him and gathered all of the current R&B and Hip-Hop music she could find. She went to jiminy and begged him to play her music on this massive stereo system! Of course, in the end she had to pay him $5000 as well, and he played her music non-stop until Alcoholica appeared, cluthching his ears to try and drown out the music...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Alchoholica on 03/09/05 at 11:02 am

... he collpased to his knees screaming in agony, 'AAAAAARRGGGHHH I..I...I.. QUI..' Then Jimminy in a double cross manouver, blinded by rage and hatred of all inferior music throws Al his Electric guitar. He begins to crank out a mind bending riff, reminiscent of all the guitar greats in one. 100 Notes per second burt forth from his fingers, destorying the sound system in a blaze of Metal Glory! Tam falls to the ground screaming.. 'DRE.. DRE WHY HATH YOU FORSAKEN ME, WHY HATH THOUH LEFT ME IN HELL'
Al calls forth all the demons of Metal Hell! But only Jeff Hannemann is still sober.. They play an amazing double attack and leave Tam laying in the ground.. or do they...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Philip Eno on 03/10/05 at 4:12 am

...walk away and...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Ripp on 03/13/05 at 9:00 am

((Hang on a mo! Do I die or not?))

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Alchoholica on 03/13/05 at 10:31 am


((Hang on a mo! Do I die or not?))


Sure why not..

..however.. the power of Metal brings Ripp back to life as a Zombie of the Metal.. she opens her mouth and lets out a gut wrenching scream of pure anguish before..

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Philip Eno on 03/13/05 at 2:51 pm

...and only belches, oh the indignity of it all, anyway..

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Alchoholica on 09/09/05 at 9:02 pm


...and only belches, oh the indignity of it all, anyway..


Philip Eno rips his own ribs out to start playing drums, they pound away driving tam further and further in to Rap Crap Hell..

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 09/10/05 at 3:08 pm

However, Philip's drumming was interrupted by the totally cacophonous sound of Apricot's iron claw scratching the blackboard in the conference room where Tam was giving her heavy metal temperance lecture, followed by Suicide~Messiah speaking in Satanic tongues .

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Cait Sith on 09/10/05 at 3:15 pm

Just then, the door flung open and, to Apricot's surprise, a heavily armoured man wielding a chainsaw in one hand and a rifle strapped to his back. He started picked everyone off one by one with his chainsaw, but Apricot was most surprised by the fact that no one even attempted to escape. Then he ran ran towards Apricot. Until the sound of scratching pierced the suspense once more, and everything was as it should be. However, the door opened and a puny, rather small and quite plump teenager walked in, introducing himself as Cait Sith...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: YWN on 09/10/05 at 3:20 pm

...and everybody stared at this teenager, and they were all thinking the exact thought:  This may be our savior.  They pleaded with Cait Sith to help them, but he just stood still with this misty look in his eyes.  He finally opened his mouth and said...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Cait Sith on 09/10/05 at 3:22 pm

..."I believe you have my stapler". He approached Apricot's desk, swiped the orange stapler lying on top of the neatly piled paper work and placed it in his pocket

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: YWN on 09/10/05 at 3:25 pm

Suddenly, they all heard a maniacal laughter.  It set fear into the hearts of everyone in the room, for no one knew where it was coming from.  All of the sudden, they saw YWN in the corner grinning to himself and laughing like a madman.  Cait Sith dropped his stapler, which startled the insane young man rambling to himself.  YWN looked around suspiciously at everyone, especially Cait Sith, and stood up.  He walked over to Apricot...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Cait Sith on 09/10/05 at 3:28 pm

...with a glint of insanity, he stared into the face of Apricot. Philip Eno, by now had finished drumming and had reinserted his rib cage and had proceeded to sneak up on YWN. Just then, YWN sucked in a lot of air, held it, his cheeks puffed out, and...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: YWN on 09/10/05 at 3:30 pm

...he hocked a big loogy and spit in Apricot's face.  Apricot didn't even bother to wipe it off.  He just glared back at YWN and glanced at Philip Eno, who was standing right behind YWN.  Philip winked and Apricot looked back at YWN...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Cait Sith on 09/10/05 at 3:36 pm

..., who then gave a sarcastic laugh in Apricot's face. Disgusted by the stench and sight of his mouth, Apricot grabbed the door stop and shoved it down his throat. YWN returned to his corner in defeat, rocking back and forth on the stool. Philip Eno turned to Apricot and said "Geez, so much for that lowsy conference. Tam did a pretty lowsy job." "Shh," said Apricot. "Why, what did she say that was of importance?" "Shh, she'll hear you!" Apricot said a bit louder. "Oh, is she behind me or something?" Philip Eno turned, but found the class staring back at him, YWN even giving him a wave. He turned back. "No...she was in front of you!" Apricot said as Philip Eno and Tam met eye to eye

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: YWN on 09/10/05 at 3:39 pm

...and she slapped Philip.  Philip gave her a dirty look.  Meanwhile, YWN was realizing that things can get generally confusing when one doesn't read an entire thread...

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Cait Sith on 09/10/05 at 3:41 pm

Cait Sith, realizing the problem at hand, decided to sit in the corner opposite of YWN and busy himself in his book, "How to Role-Play"

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Indy Gent on 09/10/05 at 3:56 pm

Unfortunately, the book was wet with dragon pee, and Cait Sith became a casual observer to YWN's writhing in pain.

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Alchoholica on 09/10/05 at 11:42 pm

Just then JIMINY! Returned, fresh from the bowels of hell! He came forth with all Satan's Minions, ANN COULTER, BILL O'REILY AND... The one knows as.. S~M!!

Quickly,. they donned there leather and black spikes and wailed a haunting ephical tune of death and destruction, Tam, Philip Eno, YWN, Indy & Cait Sith dropped to the floor, the only one that could save them now was..

Subject: Re: Story again

Written By: Cait Sith on 09/11/05 at 7:46 am

...the giant stuffed pet that Cait Sith had tied up nearby. It bounced towards the door, but suddenly realised it was far too big to fit, so...

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