it happened.  I knew it would someday.  I just prayed every night it wouldn't.

my problem with alcohol has cost me the only thing that mattered to me, my fiancee.

she just left me.

I feel strange turning to an interent message board for support and guidance but, its all I have now.

Alcohol has cost me the only thing I lived for.  I know ending it isn't the answer, but I feel like I am in hell right now.

I have a loaded gun sitting next to me.  My Dear God, I never saw myself in this position.  I have nothing to lose right now.

If you're still on the board, check your pm's.


Please, anyone reading this, pm 80sRocked and tell him what a caring, intelligent part of our little community he has become. And if he's touched a bunch of people that he doesn't know other than through the net, imagine how much he has to add to those around him (family, friends, job, etc.) in the real world. Come on people.........we have a friend that needs us!!

Please check your messages from me as well.  


You are in my thoughts.


Kimberly

80sRocked, I hope you are okay.  Please check your messages.  You are in my thoughts and prayers.  

Patrick

Hey there 80s, I sent a message to you on the PM, won't you talk with me? I would appreciate it! I am here!

Thanks
Shaz

80's Pull yourself together bro! as much as you might not think it, the world does need you! You are a much loved and respected member of this board! Keep the faith! Things have a way of working out if you try!  :) Please check your PMs as well!

  It's been awile since he posted.  Does anyone know if he's safe right now?

PM me.

You're in my prayers, friend.

I'm sorry.

All I can say is I am so sorry about all this.  As I read my original post from last night I am so asahamed and embarrassed to realize the control alcohol has over me.

I didn't expect the kind of response I got from you wonderful people either.  You don't know how much that means to me.

Last night, I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, mixed with alcohol, combined with my fiancee leaving me because of the alcohol.  I called my neighbor, a good friend, to come over because I was considering doing something drastic.  He did and took the gun away and stayed with me all night.  

Then today when I see all the response from all you guys I feel so ashamed that I was even considering that option.  

I made the decision today I am getting some help.  It is long overdue, but better late than never.  Because after last night, I realized "never" can be today, this hour, next week, who knows.


Again, I am so sorry about all this.  I feel like a fool.

And thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the kind words from you all.  The only thinkg worse than battling an addiction is batling it alone.  And I realised last night/today that because of you all, I will not be battling this alone.  And for that I am so thankful.

I may not be here much for a while, but I will be getting over this addiction.  And thats the most important thing I have to do right now.

Thanks so much, again.  


God Bless.  

No apologies needed friend.  Glad you have decided to take a different road.  Let us know how we can help.
cs

We are just glad you are still here.  If you ever need to talk, let us know.  We're here for you.  :)

You've got nothing to be ashamed of. The people that should be ashamed are the ones who stigmatize addiction in this society and treat those that have this disease* like they're some kind of leper. >:( They most certainly are not! Now go get well!!



*Yes, it is a disease, contrary to what ABC news' John Stossell or anyone else throwing together a 60 min. edited diatribe trys to tell you!! >:( (Excuse me for venting people, but this subject is a sore one for me personally.)

Good luck. Stay strong.

80sRocked it was good to hear back from you and that your taking a clear path.  Please don't feel guilty about needing help, we all do at times in our lives. Thank you for calling your friend over to provied a clearer head, that was a smart thing to do.  Take care of yourself and we will all be here when you get back.  Best days are ahead. :)

It's good to read you're going about this in a thoughtful and methodical manner and that you do have people in your personal life who genuinely care for your welfare. I was beginning to get worried back there. I hope everything works for the best. I'm glad you chose the higher road.

I am glad that you are okay.  You have been in my thoughts all day.  And remember.....you are not alone.  :)


Kimberly

I logged on just to see if any one had heard from you. I'm so glad you're doing better. No apologies are neccesary for your original post. Keep us posted on your progress. And know that we are always here for you.

I'm thinking of you too.It takes a hell of a lot of courage and guts to make the decision you've made and I wish you luck on the path you've chosen.

good luck in what's ahead.  you are in my thoughts. :)

I send you my good wishes as well, 80sRocked. Hang in there. You are cared for and needed in more ways than you know.  :)

I echo all of the sentiments above 80sR.

Hang in there please.

FB  :)

Wow!  I don't check this board for a couple of days and look what I missed!

I'm sorry I didn't get to respond to this sooner.  I was so scared for you reading the first post...I'm glad to hear you have such a good neighbor and friend close by to help you.

I'm glad to hear you are getting help, too.  My thoughts are with you.

I grew up with people with the same disease, and I know it won't be easy. We are all here to talk if you need to.  

Things will get better for you....I have faith.